Report says
thousands of children growing in violent homes
By Penelope
Paliani-Kamanga
A
report released during the 16 days of Activism by the United Nations Children’s
Fund has revealed that over 2, 4 million children in Malawi are growing under
domestic infested homes raising fears that Malawi could be breeding a violent
generation.
Unicef
Child Protection Officer Asefa Dano said at a press conference that children
growing up in such families were likely to grow and become violent adults and
parents.
He
said a study which was conducted countrywide found out that in most households
children were being subjected to physical and verbal violence where they would
either be beaten or see their parents fighting.
He
said that despite intervention and initiatives against child abuse and domestic
violence by both the state and others stakeholder’s violence in the homes was
still on the higher side.
The
report stated that the rate of co-occurrence of Malawian children experiencing
physical abuse and being exposed to domestic violence, and experiencing sexual
abuse and being exposed to domestic violence have been estimated at 20 percent
and 10 percent respectively.
Dano
said the media is awash with tragedy stories, children being raped, and beaten
by parents who are supposed to be caring for them and now these children count
2.4 million.
He
said these children grow up in resentment as there is a correlation between
child growth and his or her growing environment.
“Those
children who are growing up in houses where there is domestic violence, they
also learn to be violent in future. Children also who are growing up in
domestic violence, they are also likely to experience themselves domestic
violence.
"Information
from other countries indicates that 64 % of children who live in violent homes
are themselves abused as well,” said Mr. Dano.
Dano said
that the traumatisation of children exposed to domestic violence presents an
important challenge to legislators, policymakers and community welfare providers.
This
was substantiated with statistics from the Police Victim Support Unit in
Blantyre where it was reported that at least every day about 10 cases of domestic
violence are reported at the various police unit countrywide.
“And
most cases they come from well built families where there are children in the
houses,” read the report from the police.
MIAA
Executive Director Robert Ngaiyaye said the faith community also has also a
crucial role to play in sensitizing communities and reducing violence, abuse,
exploitation and negligence of children.
“The
children of this country face a lot of challenges in terms of abuse, torture, and
neglect by even guardians who take care of them. And therefore it is
significant that we must have a day set aside to pray for these evils.
As
religious leaders we are guided by the word God and we have the responsibility
to ensure that children are well protected,” said Ngaiyaye
Gender
Activist Tione Mwanza said there was need to put in place a range of policy
initiatives and programs that seek to address domestic violence and child
abuse, and more specifically those that address children’s exposure to domestic
violence.
Research
indicates that there are a number of strategies that could inform effective
responses to this problem, including: increased awareness of children’s
exposure to domestic violence as a form of child abuse; early intervention,
which has been identified as crucial to disrupting the intergenerational
transmission of domestic violence.
Mwanza
said that growing up in a violent home is one of the most terrifying and
traumatic experiences a child can go through. “It’s an experience that a child
will not forget. It’s an experience that can affect every aspect of a child’s
life, growth and their development.”
He said there
is a definite correlation between domestic violence and child abuse. Growing up
in a violent home can set patterns for children patterns that can cause them to
commit violence and abuse, and continue the cycle of violence and abuse.
Children
living in violent homes are often too frightened have low self esteem and
embarrassed to speak out. They are also
more apt to become high school dropouts, substance abusers, pregnant teens, gun
users, and become juvenile and adult criminals.
It’s
reported that 50 percent of the men who frequently assault their wives, also
frequently abuse their children. School-age kids who grow up in violent homes
generally exhibit a range of problem behaviors such as: depression, anxiety,
and violence towards their peers.
When a
parent terrorizes another parent, their children are terrorized too! Anger is
deeply set within those children … anger that is so deep and long-lasting that
when that child reaches adulthood, the damage is already done.
The
terrorist parent leaves his children an incredible legacy of pain and problems
-- societal and emotional problems that may never disappear.
Thandi a
survivor of domestic violence said: “She didn’t think she ever could have known
what an impact and witnessing domestic violence would have on her son’s life.
Her son witnessed domestic violence continuously for the first six years of his
life. His behavior became progressively worse, especially as he began to
socialize with other kids.
In
kindergarten he became outraged if something did not go his way, and on many
occasions, bit other children so hard that he drew blood. He would often slam
and break things for no apparent reason, and had constant violent temper
tantrums. It was at this time that this victim found the courage to leave the
violent relationship she had with her son’s father.
He was
physically aggressive towards other students, and constantly walked out of
class when teachers confronted him with his disruptive behavior. The school
alerted the mother to the fact that her son’s behavior wasn’t normal. Although
her struggle as a victim is over, she must now stand by and watch her son
struggle through the same journey.
She feels
she failed to protect him. There is nothing she can do to make it better, as
her son experiences the effects of a family legacy that has claimed many
victims. She has now sought psychological assistance for her son to deal with
this long and painful legacy.
We know
that violence is learned behavior. Children learn it from their parents and the
cycle continues.
We also
know that whatever is learned can be unlearned. It is up to all of us to be
educated and learn all of the signs, symptoms and what we can do to stop
children from hurting – to destroy the legacy!
CHILDREN
WHO GROW UP IN HOMES WHERE VIOLENCE IS PRESENT ARE:
- 6 times
more likely to commit suicide
- 24
times more likely to be sexually assaulted
- 67
times more likely to engage in delinquent behavior as an adolescent
- 100
times more likely to be abusers themselves
